Create Your Safety Plan
Before making your safety plan and learning more about this topic, please consider viewing our page on safe technology use.
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When creating your safety plan to escape an abuser, consider the following:
Identify Safe Places: Choose locations where you can go for immediate safety, such as a trusted friend or family member's home, or a local shelter.
Keep Important Documents Ready: Gather essential identification documents, financial information, and any legal paperwork that may be necessary for your escape.
Plan for Transportation: Determine how you will leave your current location. You may want to keep a car parked nearby or have access to public transportation.
Create a Communication Strategy: Establish a method to contact friends, family, or support services without alerting your abuser. This could include using a different phone, email, or a discreet app. You can view more on using safe technology here.
Prepare an Emergency Bag: Pack a bag with essential items, including clothing, medications, money, and important documents. Keep this bag hidden in a safe place or in your vehicle if possible.
Establish Code Words or Signals: Create a code word or signal that you can use with trusted individuals to indicate that you are in danger and need help.
Know Your Rights: Familiarize yourself with local laws regarding domestic violence and your rights to seek protection, such as obtaining a restraining order.
Practice Your Plan: Rehearse your escape plan so you feel more prepared when the time comes. Consider what you will do in various scenarios.
Reach Out for Support: Contact local organizations or hotlines that specialize in helping victims of abuse. They can provide resources, counseling, and legal assistance. You can view our list here.
Trust Your Instincts: Always listen to your intuition regarding your safety and the environment around you. If you feel that it is not safe to execute your plan, adjust as needed until the right opportunity arises.
Protecting Your Children and Pets
If you have children or animals that you need to bring with you to keep them safe during an escape from your abuser, here are some things to consider:
Plan Ahead: Determine a safe place where you can go. This could be a shelter, a friend's house, or a family member's home.
Pack Essentials: Gather necessary items for your children and pets, including identification documents, medical records, and any needed medications.
Emergency Kit: Create a grab-and-go bag that includes food, water, toys for children, pet supplies like food and a leash, and essential clothing.
Safe Transportation: Consider how you will transport your children and pets. Ensure your vehicle is safe and you have enough fuel.
Secure Identification: Make sure each family member, including pets, has proper identification. This is crucial in case you become separated.
Create Safe Words: Teach your children how to react if they feel threatened and discuss safe words or signals that mean it's time to escape. Be sure not to share anything with your children that you feel they would repeat to your abuser.
Support Network: Reach out to trusted friends or family members who can assist you during your escape and may provide immediate help.
Disguise Your Abilities: If possible, keep your plans discreet to avoid alerting your abuser. Avoid discussing your plans in person or online.
Seek Professional Help: Consider contacting a domestic violence hotline or counselor who can provide guidance on how to safely navigate the escape.
Being prepared can make a significant difference in ensuring the safety of your loved ones during this challenging time.
The National Domestic Violence Hotline website has resources available for safety plans. To use their interactive personalized safety plan generator, click here.